"after every rain, there's sunshine at the end"...
mm.... they've failed to mention, after that awesome, bright, hot sunshine, there could be storm, hurricane, or even worst.
Why does happiness doesn't last forever? Why does fairytales seems just too bloody good to be true? Is it just so damn hard to find that bitter beginning but, sweet ending story? How I wish my life would sometime end like 'Notting hill' or 'sleepless in seattle' or 'when harry meets sally'?
that's why they say "those only happen in movies..." *sigh*
at times like these, I wish I have smart words, or clever phrases to depict my inner thoughts, yet I only have simple boring figure of speech. Yes, I'm no Sydney Shieldon or some marvelous writer. All I have, is me.
Why do people can be thicker than skin? Why does some, can't seem to realize what they've done hurt others, when it's so above surface than skin? shit. what Am i babbling?
Okay, So I've said things that I might or might not regret in the past hour, but should I really regret? hell No. Why not? hmm, I've gone through so much, without "you" knowing.
to you:
if only, we traded shoes, I could see what you see,
I could hear what you heared,
I could feel what you feel,
I could feel your pain.
for once, have you placed yourself in my shoe?
for once, has honesty been with us? to yourself? to me? to the world?
why?
coward-ness?
selfishness?
worthiness?
Yes, First impression lasts, but not for long,
for they say "don't judge a book just by it's freaking title..."
read the whole book, you'd know if the book is just worth keeping.
To you,
I'm sorry if my words tainted your colors,
never I meant, to kill the cat,
I've gave all I have, all my love,
for you throw it all away,
thank you, you've opened my eyes.
to a new brighter world, to a new chapter, to a new book.
Now, I won't just buy a book for it's cover, for it's title,
but for the stories, the book keeps.
A new person,
a new leaf
a new life,
a new year.
2010, I wait for you to come.
Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
Life in gray
“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her.'”
I'm feeling kinda blue today, for no apparent reasons.
I've gone through so much this year. My biggest question still remain unanswered, but I'll stop asking and just pick myself up when all this has ended. I'm not looking forward for it, but I'm letting myself love as much as I could, and stop when it's time to.
It's hard for me to understand or explain the situation. Love just moves you in a mysterious way. You wouldn't know when it sinked into you, and the next thing you know, you can't stop.
mm... probably when skies are clearer and birds sing at my window pane, I'll write good things. till then... let it be gray.
the one with a braveface
audrey.
I'm feeling kinda blue today, for no apparent reasons.
I've gone through so much this year. My biggest question still remain unanswered, but I'll stop asking and just pick myself up when all this has ended. I'm not looking forward for it, but I'm letting myself love as much as I could, and stop when it's time to.
It's hard for me to understand or explain the situation. Love just moves you in a mysterious way. You wouldn't know when it sinked into you, and the next thing you know, you can't stop.
mm... probably when skies are clearer and birds sing at my window pane, I'll write good things. till then... let it be gray.
the one with a braveface
audrey.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Marriage v/s Single
“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always
with the same person.”... Mignon McLaughin
A few months ago, I read about the nation’s declining rate of birth and somehow it made me ponder on few things. I think, most of my highschool friends are married, and are at least with 1 baby. However, I’m happy to say, I still got tons of friends that aren’t married (haha). Oh! And the number is not declining at an alarming rate (I meant friends that aren’t married).
Why is the nation’s birth rate is declining?
Well, one thing for sure, it’s hard to find families that has more than 6 children these days. Unlike our parents or grandparents era who has like 10 - 12 siblings. Let’s just put it more than 6. Shall we?
1. The 22nd century makes it expensive to have more than 6 children! Taxes, fuel, wet & dry food are expensive. I don’t think you can buy any decent food with just RM3.00 at any big cities in M’sia. Thankfully, I’m glad to say, I can still find good Rm3.00 nasi campur in Sandakan. I’m blessed!!
2. More than 6 children spells CHAOS.
3. Women are getting smarter by the day.
4. MOST IMPORTANTLY..... single population is increasing.
I’m not gonna carry on discussing about nation’s birth rate since I’m not married (yet). I’d like to have a say on my topic today. Marriage v/s Single.
There’s been countless battle on the issue Marriage or Single, which is better and so on.
For me, marriage is sacred. It’s not easy, but at the same time, it’s not suppose to be hell. I remembered someone told me,
“marriage is a job. You need to work for it, to make it work”
People spend roughly RM20K to get married, yet, it only probably takes RM100 to get divorced.
People get married to fornicate and make babies, and later craps about it, and make statements like “how i wish I’m still single” at one point of their later life or say “I never get to buy anything for myself anymore!”... (duh!)
Colleagues and family friends come up to me and say, “Audrey, you’re at a marriageable age already. Bah, bila lagi?” omaigat! Is it so wrong that I’m still single? Is it wrong to be single? What? Now I’m an alien just because I’m still single? Rofl.
Being unmarried, I don’t really know what or how marriage is suppose to be. But, I’d say marriage needs understanding, commitment, sacrifices, tolerance, and Love.
Love alone does not suffice.
Have you ever wonder, some couples dated so long just to find out in the end they don’t want to spend their lives together. Some couple, takes less than a year and boom boom pow, they’re married and few years later, they get divorced. But for some, it’s just meant to be. I call them the lucky ones.
While typing this, it makes me wanna write on. “is there really Mr/Ms. Right.”
Some women/men dread about being single. Why should you? What’s so bad about being single?
Think about it. When you’re single .....
1. You do not have to report duty to anybody called “husband”. Or in a guy case, your WIFE.
2. No calls after 9pm asking where you are, who you’re with, what you’re doing etc etc. (for both men and women)
3. You do not have to wash extra clothes other than yours alone.(for women)
4. No unwanted clothes lying on the floor (for women)
5. No disgusting pee spill all over the toilet bowl (for women)
6. You can earn extra cash when you’re single. Be smart. (for both men and women)
7. Able to shop and pamper yourself. (for both men and women)
8. You can go wherever you want to without worry. At least not about family that is... probably financially only. (for both men and women)
9. You lead your life the way you want it to be. (again, for both men and women)
10. I can go on and on about the greatness being single..... but let me stop before I offend anybody.
I know, some of you might say.... “.....BUT single”. ALONE. DUHHH... what are friends for? Find friends of course! I’m pretty sure that I’m not the only living single girl around.
Though being married has it perks and I bet it’s awesome too. Why?
1. You’ve got a lifetime companion. Growing old together. Sharing ups and downs. Doing things together.....(if you don’t get divorced....)
2. You get kids (I’m not saying you can’t get any kids if you’re single.... there are ways...)
3. The first thing you get up and the last thing you’d do – see that person’s face whom you love so much... (you won’t probably do this when you fight....)
4. Combined income (dunno if it’s a good thing, but it should. Isn’t it?)
5. ...... married people please carry out this list... cause I don’t have anymore. I’m not one, remember?
So there you go. What say you?
To married citizens,
Get married for the right reason. Once married, stay committed.
To my fellow single comrades,
Don’t worry be happy.
Don’t get me wrong with this post people,
I STILL wanna get my feet swept by a charming lad on a chevy, JUST JOKING.
What I meant, I do still see myself in a white dress though a very blurry picture in my imagination. I still want to get swept and fall into the arms of my knight shining armour, rescuing me in the jungles.And get married. Hehe.... STILL JOKING
What I really meant was, I still believe in the institution of MARRIAGE
What I’m saying is, be with someone you’re in love and you won’t regret to be married with to even though through good and most importantly, BAD TIMES.
I do not dread about being single. I like my single life. hassle free.....
I leave you with,
By Bruce Fisher and Robert Alberti
Many people marry for the wrong reasons, among them 1) to overcome loneliness, 2) to escape an unhappy parental home, 3) because they think that everyone is expected to marry, 4) because only "losers" who can't find someone to marry stay single, 5) out of a need to parent, or be parented by another person, 6) because they got pregnant, 7) because "we fell in love," ... and on goes the list.
Cheers mate.
Signing off,
The happy single sepet eyed girl
“to be or not to be”
with the same person.”... Mignon McLaughin
A few months ago, I read about the nation’s declining rate of birth and somehow it made me ponder on few things. I think, most of my highschool friends are married, and are at least with 1 baby. However, I’m happy to say, I still got tons of friends that aren’t married (haha). Oh! And the number is not declining at an alarming rate (I meant friends that aren’t married).
Why is the nation’s birth rate is declining?
Well, one thing for sure, it’s hard to find families that has more than 6 children these days. Unlike our parents or grandparents era who has like 10 - 12 siblings. Let’s just put it more than 6. Shall we?
1. The 22nd century makes it expensive to have more than 6 children! Taxes, fuel, wet & dry food are expensive. I don’t think you can buy any decent food with just RM3.00 at any big cities in M’sia. Thankfully, I’m glad to say, I can still find good Rm3.00 nasi campur in Sandakan. I’m blessed!!
2. More than 6 children spells CHAOS.
3. Women are getting smarter by the day.
4. MOST IMPORTANTLY..... single population is increasing.
I’m not gonna carry on discussing about nation’s birth rate since I’m not married (yet). I’d like to have a say on my topic today. Marriage v/s Single.
There’s been countless battle on the issue Marriage or Single, which is better and so on.
For me, marriage is sacred. It’s not easy, but at the same time, it’s not suppose to be hell. I remembered someone told me,
“marriage is a job. You need to work for it, to make it work”
People spend roughly RM20K to get married, yet, it only probably takes RM100 to get divorced.
People get married to fornicate and make babies, and later craps about it, and make statements like “how i wish I’m still single” at one point of their later life or say “I never get to buy anything for myself anymore!”... (duh!)
Colleagues and family friends come up to me and say, “Audrey, you’re at a marriageable age already. Bah, bila lagi?” omaigat! Is it so wrong that I’m still single? Is it wrong to be single? What? Now I’m an alien just because I’m still single? Rofl.
Being unmarried, I don’t really know what or how marriage is suppose to be. But, I’d say marriage needs understanding, commitment, sacrifices, tolerance, and Love.
Love alone does not suffice.
Have you ever wonder, some couples dated so long just to find out in the end they don’t want to spend their lives together. Some couple, takes less than a year and boom boom pow, they’re married and few years later, they get divorced. But for some, it’s just meant to be. I call them the lucky ones.
While typing this, it makes me wanna write on. “is there really Mr/Ms. Right.”
Some women/men dread about being single. Why should you? What’s so bad about being single?
Think about it. When you’re single .....
1. You do not have to report duty to anybody called “husband”. Or in a guy case, your WIFE.
2. No calls after 9pm asking where you are, who you’re with, what you’re doing etc etc. (for both men and women)
3. You do not have to wash extra clothes other than yours alone.(for women)
4. No unwanted clothes lying on the floor (for women)
5. No disgusting pee spill all over the toilet bowl (for women)
6. You can earn extra cash when you’re single. Be smart. (for both men and women)
7. Able to shop and pamper yourself. (for both men and women)
8. You can go wherever you want to without worry. At least not about family that is... probably financially only. (for both men and women)
9. You lead your life the way you want it to be. (again, for both men and women)
10. I can go on and on about the greatness being single..... but let me stop before I offend anybody.
I know, some of you might say.... “.....BUT single”. ALONE. DUHHH... what are friends for? Find friends of course! I’m pretty sure that I’m not the only living single girl around.
Though being married has it perks and I bet it’s awesome too. Why?
1. You’ve got a lifetime companion. Growing old together. Sharing ups and downs. Doing things together.....(if you don’t get divorced....)
2. You get kids (I’m not saying you can’t get any kids if you’re single.... there are ways...)
3. The first thing you get up and the last thing you’d do – see that person’s face whom you love so much... (you won’t probably do this when you fight....)
4. Combined income (dunno if it’s a good thing, but it should. Isn’t it?)
5. ...... married people please carry out this list... cause I don’t have anymore. I’m not one, remember?
So there you go. What say you?
To married citizens,
Get married for the right reason. Once married, stay committed.
To my fellow single comrades,
Don’t worry be happy.
Don’t get me wrong with this post people,
I STILL wanna get my feet swept by a charming lad on a chevy, JUST JOKING.
What I meant, I do still see myself in a white dress though a very blurry picture in my imagination. I still want to get swept and fall into the arms of my knight shining armour, rescuing me in the jungles.And get married. Hehe.... STILL JOKING
What I really meant was, I still believe in the institution of MARRIAGE
What I’m saying is, be with someone you’re in love and you won’t regret to be married with to even though through good and most importantly, BAD TIMES.
I do not dread about being single. I like my single life. hassle free.....
I leave you with,
By Bruce Fisher and Robert Alberti
Many people marry for the wrong reasons, among them 1) to overcome loneliness, 2) to escape an unhappy parental home, 3) because they think that everyone is expected to marry, 4) because only "losers" who can't find someone to marry stay single, 5) out of a need to parent, or be parented by another person, 6) because they got pregnant, 7) because "we fell in love," ... and on goes the list.
Cheers mate.
Signing off,
The happy single sepet eyed girl
“to be or not to be”
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
August 18: My Last Words, My Last Love, A Letter To You
From the words of my lady,
“what am I to you?, tell me darling true”
I’ve been sitting for days now thinking of the right thing to say. Over and over I listen to Norah trying to find some consolation to the questions playing repeatedly in my head. I’ve never been a person who has flair for words to put matters across to people, emotionally that is.
Little did I know what started over a night of a hasty decision, turned into something I couldn’t explain. Maybe, for once I’m trying to tell you. Perhaps.
“When I look into your eyes,
I could feel butterflies...”
I blindly entered a battle of war of truth and lies, existence and love. Why did I? Why did you? Was it the butterflies?
I’m torn between 2 worlds. One world tells me that it is wrong for me to be around you. The other kept assuring me it wasn’t. In both, I lost. Contemplating over this, it made me question myself, Why You? Was it your perfume? Was it the sound of your voice? Was it your touch? I hated the emotions. Which emotions? Hatred? Guilt? Satisfaction? Happy? Or love?
“Opened up my heart
Never want to part
I'm giving you the ball”
I constantly reminded myself, “no commitments, no strings attach”. Bullshit I say.
A dance wouldn’t be a dance, when only 1 dances.
A clap won’t sound, if one tries with just one hand.
A match won’t be one with one team playing.
Why this long?
I’ve smiled, I’ve laughed, I’ve listened, I’ve cried, I’ve had sleepless nights, I’ve hurt, I’ve cared, I’ve done more than “no strings attached, No commitments”.
We’ve sung, we’ve danced, we’ve held hands, we’ve kissed, we’ve had long nights, we’ve argued, we’ve shared, we’ve talked, Tell me, is it really “no strings attached? No commitments?”
What is real between us? I’m “non-existence”. Remember?
All it was, was just a “blip”.
All honesty, all truth fades in this world we’ve created.
What do you expect me to feel after 6 months? Hate? Like? Non-existence feelings?
I’m still just a person made of clay.
Both just alike in many ways, different in many ways.
“See I cry if you hurt
I'd give you my last shirt
Because I love you so”
“I love You”.... 3 little words, yet tremendous effect on one. We’ve uttered them, yet, it’s meaning? Empty.
I shy away from the truth of my existence, because I don’t deserve to. Neither you.
For the last time, I’ll say these to you, I love you.
I’m a changed person because of me, not you.
I want to change, because I want to, not for you.
I deserve to be happy, because of me. Not you.
At the end of the battle, I’ll turn my back, and see myself right to the door. I’ve got nothing to lose, because I survived. I survived the pain. I survived the heartache. I’ll go .We’ve parted ways, and let it be there.
Non-existence world we created,
Leaving behind the memories we dreamed,
Between you and me,
Let the love fade,
For now or never, if love prevails
Forever it stays.
To you,
I leave this question to you, ask deep within yourself, let all honesty, all truth within u answer.
What am I to You?
Yours truly,
xoxo
audreythe fragile heart
“what am I to you?, tell me darling true”
I’ve been sitting for days now thinking of the right thing to say. Over and over I listen to Norah trying to find some consolation to the questions playing repeatedly in my head. I’ve never been a person who has flair for words to put matters across to people, emotionally that is.
Little did I know what started over a night of a hasty decision, turned into something I couldn’t explain. Maybe, for once I’m trying to tell you. Perhaps.
“When I look into your eyes,
I could feel butterflies...”
I blindly entered a battle of war of truth and lies, existence and love. Why did I? Why did you? Was it the butterflies?
I’m torn between 2 worlds. One world tells me that it is wrong for me to be around you. The other kept assuring me it wasn’t. In both, I lost. Contemplating over this, it made me question myself, Why You? Was it your perfume? Was it the sound of your voice? Was it your touch? I hated the emotions. Which emotions? Hatred? Guilt? Satisfaction? Happy? Or love?
“Opened up my heart
Never want to part
I'm giving you the ball”
I constantly reminded myself, “no commitments, no strings attach”. Bullshit I say.
A dance wouldn’t be a dance, when only 1 dances.
A clap won’t sound, if one tries with just one hand.
A match won’t be one with one team playing.
Why this long?
I’ve smiled, I’ve laughed, I’ve listened, I’ve cried, I’ve had sleepless nights, I’ve hurt, I’ve cared, I’ve done more than “no strings attached, No commitments”.
We’ve sung, we’ve danced, we’ve held hands, we’ve kissed, we’ve had long nights, we’ve argued, we’ve shared, we’ve talked, Tell me, is it really “no strings attached? No commitments?”
What is real between us? I’m “non-existence”. Remember?
All it was, was just a “blip”.
All honesty, all truth fades in this world we’ve created.
What do you expect me to feel after 6 months? Hate? Like? Non-existence feelings?
I’m still just a person made of clay.
Both just alike in many ways, different in many ways.
“See I cry if you hurt
I'd give you my last shirt
Because I love you so”
“I love You”.... 3 little words, yet tremendous effect on one. We’ve uttered them, yet, it’s meaning? Empty.
I shy away from the truth of my existence, because I don’t deserve to. Neither you.
For the last time, I’ll say these to you, I love you.
I’m a changed person because of me, not you.
I want to change, because I want to, not for you.
I deserve to be happy, because of me. Not you.
At the end of the battle, I’ll turn my back, and see myself right to the door. I’ve got nothing to lose, because I survived. I survived the pain. I survived the heartache. I’ll go .We’ve parted ways, and let it be there.
Non-existence world we created,
Leaving behind the memories we dreamed,
Between you and me,
Let the love fade,
For now or never, if love prevails
Forever it stays.
To you,
I leave this question to you, ask deep within yourself, let all honesty, all truth within u answer.
What am I to You?
Yours truly,
xoxo
audreythe fragile heart
Monday, May 25, 2009
A Song For You
I know I haven't been writing anything lately. I blame it on procrastination, lost for smart words and ideas, and hi-rising level of laziness. To be fair though, I actually had a saved-needed-to-be edited post before this one. But..... never got the time. (yea.. rite) Oh well, I'm gonna make it up with this post. It's gonna be a good one... promise (pergh.. perasan tahap dewa).
I've always loved singing for as long as I can remember. Sadly, I'm not much of a singer to be honest. Music has played a very big part in my life. Through every chapter of my life, through good and bad, laughter and tears, heartaches and break-ups. I must say, there's always a song for every mood I am in.
To me, every song has its story. Especially when it reminds you of a person. A song can be a place where you keep memories of you and someone. No matter near or far, in hatred or in love, you always have that person in mind when you listen to that "song". It brings back old memories, stories you've shared, jokes you've laughed, moments you wish you could have once again. So, a "SONG" is the place where you get to meet that "someone" again. (well, to me at least)
Recently, a chapter in my life began knowingly which somehow ended without me realizing it. I guess, things just happens in a way I can't understand what God is planning for me. No matter what it is, I'll just take the cruise HE is giving me.
Putting everything together (this is the good part.... hohoho)
I wrote a lil' song, for a person, because of a person.
Hopefully, everytime I listen back to this song, it'll remind me of that person.
this is a sad song to start of with,
to AstroBoy (you know who u r)
A story of dreams,
that wasn't mine to hold, to start.
to a love that had no truth, no existence
to an emotion that had no pride.
because of you.
I wish you love and bid you goodbye
I wrote this song because of you
May I'll see you in this song.
in summer, winter, autumn n spring.
Because of You.
song and lyrics by Audrey
I love the way you look at me
i get so weak on my knees
because
i get butterflies when u r around
i get tingles in my heart now
but its all because of you
because of you
i like to hear you say "i missed you"
i look away so shy my boo
because I get butterflies when u r around
i get tingles in my heart now
but it's all because of you
because of you..
you wrap ur fingers around mine
i want to hold it all the time
because you give me butterflies when u r around
i get tingles in my heart now
but it's all because of you
because of you..
you wonder why
oh why this lullaby plays on and on my love
I've nothing much to say,
then to tell you
it's all because of you
To all, I'm just gonna post the lyrics for now. I don't think I've got the guts to post the song here till I think I couldn't care less what the people think of the song n my singing. The song is nothing great really, but... it's mine. One day perhaps...
Till fingers meet keyboard,
xoxo,
Aud,
I've always loved singing for as long as I can remember. Sadly, I'm not much of a singer to be honest. Music has played a very big part in my life. Through every chapter of my life, through good and bad, laughter and tears, heartaches and break-ups. I must say, there's always a song for every mood I am in.
To me, every song has its story. Especially when it reminds you of a person. A song can be a place where you keep memories of you and someone. No matter near or far, in hatred or in love, you always have that person in mind when you listen to that "song". It brings back old memories, stories you've shared, jokes you've laughed, moments you wish you could have once again. So, a "SONG" is the place where you get to meet that "someone" again. (well, to me at least)
Recently, a chapter in my life began knowingly which somehow ended without me realizing it. I guess, things just happens in a way I can't understand what God is planning for me. No matter what it is, I'll just take the cruise HE is giving me.
Putting everything together (this is the good part.... hohoho)
I wrote a lil' song, for a person, because of a person.
Hopefully, everytime I listen back to this song, it'll remind me of that person.
this is a sad song to start of with,
to AstroBoy (you know who u r)
A story of dreams,
that wasn't mine to hold, to start.
to a love that had no truth, no existence
to an emotion that had no pride.
because of you.
I wish you love and bid you goodbye
I wrote this song because of you
May I'll see you in this song.
in summer, winter, autumn n spring.
Because of You.
song and lyrics by Audrey
I love the way you look at me
i get so weak on my knees
because
i get butterflies when u r around
i get tingles in my heart now
but its all because of you
because of you
i like to hear you say "i missed you"
i look away so shy my boo
because I get butterflies when u r around
i get tingles in my heart now
but it's all because of you
because of you..
you wrap ur fingers around mine
i want to hold it all the time
because you give me butterflies when u r around
i get tingles in my heart now
but it's all because of you
because of you..
you wonder why
oh why this lullaby plays on and on my love
I've nothing much to say,
then to tell you
it's all because of you
To all, I'm just gonna post the lyrics for now. I don't think I've got the guts to post the song here till I think I couldn't care less what the people think of the song n my singing. The song is nothing great really, but... it's mine. One day perhaps...
Till fingers meet keyboard,
xoxo,
Aud,
Monday, April 27, 2009
Love Factor - Right Person, Wrong Timing.
It's a quiet and warm night. (i miss the rain...)
While my fingers are pinned to the keys of the lappy, I let my brains run wild with ideas to write tonight. Yet, I'm still hopelessly trying to find the right things to write and end up crapping.
Honestly, I don't want this cyberworld I have here to be just a place for me to crap most of the time. (I think the weather is making me go a bit blue tonight).
After a quiet, an alone "me" time dindin, I find myself mulling over things that had happen these past few months.
"why?", "what?", "when?", "how?","who?"
The "WH" questions keeps playing repeatedly in my head like a broken tape player.
Can just someone stop it already?
Then.. I remembered, a conversation I had not long ago with a girlfriend..
"where have all the good guys gone to?"
"They're either taken"
"or... Married".....(long pause, with a snort, and a "duh!" look)
"or.. GAY"
true? perhaps.
Though my belief in the "Right Guy" or in some other terms and context "The One" exist for every girl may have fade over the years after meeting the bunch of mens I've bumped into, but, I do still believe it exist..(yes girls... you may call me foolish for saying that).
Some people have the privilege to date each other and stay in love for so long and only marry after years of dating since high school. Some were high school sweethearts, dated for so long only to realize they weren't right together and parted ways. Others, only took a year, or just months to know "he/she is THE ONE". In Hollywood, takes minutes to get hitched and only realize 24hrs after they're married, they were actually wrong for each other. (bizarred?)
I'm sure you've been in a situation where you've met this new person, and came to know his/her attitude and personality after sometime, and....before you know it, you've started to have that "itchy likey" feeling towards that person. It started with cute, interesting, naive shorts texts (the fishing game I call it), short phone calls, meeting up for a drink in a group...evolved to texting continuously (smiling while reading and replying those texts), more than 3 times a day phone calls (with small laughs that irritates others), meeting up for dinner and finding every reason to meet.
It leaves you with a gluey, warm, happy feeling doesn't it? (it makes your heart go "aaaahh.. or Mmmm... and awww....)
Then this situation goes to a state where you say, "bummer!"...
He has a taken or attached or married or gay or "it's complicated" status! (bummer!)
This goes back to my earlier WH questions which are still madly playing at the back of my head while I'm writing this.
Why You? Why Now? Why not before this? How could I? What am I feeling? When is it ending? How is it gonna be? Why did I meet you?
Who is Us?
What is Us?
then.. it evolved to my "What If" questions.
I answered, all my questions with...
"it was never mine from the beginning"
"It never was mine to start off, never could be, never will be."
He's the "right guy" because of the person he is. The way we are when we're together. The way our mind thinks (though it may not be alike and we misunderstand each other most of the time). Our differences and imperfections are just right. (probably I could be just exaggerating the whole situation). Our likings are just perfect.
We score A+ in Chemistry.
and yet, wrong timing.
why?
till fingers meet keyboards,
signin' off...
audrey
xoxo
While my fingers are pinned to the keys of the lappy, I let my brains run wild with ideas to write tonight. Yet, I'm still hopelessly trying to find the right things to write and end up crapping.
Honestly, I don't want this cyberworld I have here to be just a place for me to crap most of the time. (I think the weather is making me go a bit blue tonight).
After a quiet, an alone "me" time dindin, I find myself mulling over things that had happen these past few months.
"why?", "what?", "when?", "how?","who?"
The "WH" questions keeps playing repeatedly in my head like a broken tape player.
Can just someone stop it already?
Then.. I remembered, a conversation I had not long ago with a girlfriend..
"where have all the good guys gone to?"
"They're either taken"
"or... Married".....(long pause, with a snort, and a "duh!" look)
"or.. GAY"
true? perhaps.
Though my belief in the "Right Guy" or in some other terms and context "The One" exist for every girl may have fade over the years after meeting the bunch of mens I've bumped into, but, I do still believe it exist..(yes girls... you may call me foolish for saying that).
Some people have the privilege to date each other and stay in love for so long and only marry after years of dating since high school. Some were high school sweethearts, dated for so long only to realize they weren't right together and parted ways. Others, only took a year, or just months to know "he/she is THE ONE". In Hollywood, takes minutes to get hitched and only realize 24hrs after they're married, they were actually wrong for each other. (bizarred?)
I'm sure you've been in a situation where you've met this new person, and came to know his/her attitude and personality after sometime, and....before you know it, you've started to have that "itchy likey" feeling towards that person. It started with cute, interesting, naive shorts texts (the fishing game I call it), short phone calls, meeting up for a drink in a group...evolved to texting continuously (smiling while reading and replying those texts), more than 3 times a day phone calls (with small laughs that irritates others), meeting up for dinner and finding every reason to meet.
It leaves you with a gluey, warm, happy feeling doesn't it? (it makes your heart go "aaaahh.. or Mmmm... and awww....)
Then this situation goes to a state where you say, "bummer!"...
He has a taken or attached or married or gay or "it's complicated" status! (bummer!)
This goes back to my earlier WH questions which are still madly playing at the back of my head while I'm writing this.
Why You? Why Now? Why not before this? How could I? What am I feeling? When is it ending? How is it gonna be? Why did I meet you?
Who is Us?
What is Us?
then.. it evolved to my "What If" questions.
I answered, all my questions with...
"it was never mine from the beginning"
"It never was mine to start off, never could be, never will be."
He's the "right guy" because of the person he is. The way we are when we're together. The way our mind thinks (though it may not be alike and we misunderstand each other most of the time). Our differences and imperfections are just right. (probably I could be just exaggerating the whole situation). Our likings are just perfect.
We score A+ in Chemistry.
and yet, wrong timing.
why?
till fingers meet keyboards,
signin' off...
audrey
xoxo
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)