Love Factor - Right Person, Wrong Timing.

It's a quiet and warm night. (i miss the rain...)

While my fingers are pinned to the keys of the lappy, I let my brains run wild with ideas to write tonight. Yet, I'm still hopelessly trying to find the right things to write and end up crapping.

Honestly, I don't want this cyberworld I have here to be just a place for me to crap most of the time. (I think the weather is making me go a bit blue tonight).

After a quiet, an alone "me" time dindin, I find myself mulling over things that had happen these past few months.

"why?", "what?", "when?", "how?","who?"

The "WH" questions keeps playing repeatedly in my head like a broken tape player.
Can just someone stop it already?

Then.. I remembered, a conversation I had not long ago with a girlfriend..

"where have all the good guys gone to?"
"They're either taken"
"or... Married".....(long pause, with a snort, and a "duh!" look)
"or.. GAY"

true? perhaps.

Though my belief in the "Right Guy" or in some other terms and context "The One" exist for every girl may have fade over the years after meeting the bunch of mens I've bumped into, but, I do still believe it exist..(yes girls... you may call me foolish for saying that).

Some people have the privilege to date each other and stay in love for so long and only marry after years of dating since high school. Some were high school sweethearts, dated for so long only to realize they weren't right together and parted ways. Others, only took a year, or just months to know "he/she is THE ONE". In Hollywood, takes minutes to get hitched and only realize 24hrs after they're married, they were actually wrong for each other. (bizarred?)

I'm sure you've been in a situation where you've met this new person, and came to know his/her attitude and personality after sometime, and....before you know it, you've started to have that "itchy likey" feeling towards that person. It started with cute, interesting, naive shorts texts (the fishing game I call it), short phone calls, meeting up for a drink in a group...evolved to texting continuously (smiling while reading and replying those texts), more than 3 times a day phone calls (with small laughs that irritates others), meeting up for dinner and finding every reason to meet.

It leaves you with a gluey, warm, happy feeling doesn't it? (it makes your heart go "aaaahh.. or Mmmm... and awww....)

Then this situation goes to a state where you say, "bummer!"...

He has a taken or attached or married or gay or "it's complicated" status! (bummer!)

This goes back to my earlier WH questions which are still madly playing at the back of my head while I'm writing this.

Why You? Why Now? Why not before this? How could I? What am I feeling? When is it ending? How is it gonna be? Why did I meet you?
Who is Us?
What is Us?

then.. it evolved to my "What If" questions.

I answered, all my questions with...

"it was never mine from the beginning"
"It never was mine to start off, never could be, never will be."

He's the "right guy" because of the person he is. The way we are when we're together. The way our mind thinks (though it may not be alike and we misunderstand each other most of the time). Our differences and imperfections are just right. (probably I could be just exaggerating the whole situation). Our likings are just perfect.

We score A+ in Chemistry.

and yet, wrong timing.

why?


till fingers meet keyboards,
signin' off...
audrey
xoxo

Days In Sandakan

I'm very overwhelmed by the response from my little yet, supportive readers (which I appreciate so much for visiting my blog) on my previous post "10 things about AstroBoy".

It's an exciting feeling to know that there are actually some who reads my blog. Thank you again.
Many has been asking me about "AstroBoy"... "who is he?", "is he real?". I've been told to continue my post on "AstroBoy" again. Well, no promises. That's all. Well, maybe another post or two on AstroBoy? I'll think about it.

As some may know that I am now officially based in Sandakan (Lord knows how long I'll be stuck here). I've been back n forth from KK TO Kl to KK to KL again.. n KK n Sandakan , and honestly, it's a bit tiring I must say.

Not that I don't like to be living with my folks (missing home terribly actually), but, I think being a Capri, I love the freedom and the sense of independance living afar from home. AND, besides, it's thrilling everytime I get the chance to be back in Kota Kinabalu.

Today marks the 3rd month I've been in Sandakan the land of Orang Utan, Proboscis Monkeys, The land of Cheap food,booze and Seafood, the land where people are proud of their Giant Supermarket (I will tell you why in a bit),The land where road lights are scarce and full of shitty drivers around, last but not least, The land where places are called by "Miles" (found it rather bizzarely strange at first , but got the hang of it after a while. FYI, Mile 4 - Mile paling famous ni..)

Let me do a 5 things I like and Don't Like about Sandakan.

5 things I LIKE about Sandakan
1. Cheap Food
2. No traffic Jams
3. Cheap Booze
4. Not a busy and hectic town
5. (yet to be filled)

5 things I DON'T LIKE about Sandakan
1. Less choice of Food (I long for McD and Burger King, crave for Big Apple's Donuts)
2. No Shopping Malls (the VERY reason why do people of sandakan are very proud of the Giant Supermarket)
3. Boring (don't ask me why, wait till you get here)
4. CAR DRIVERS (shitty drivers everywhere, no sense of giving signals.)
5. Slow (drivers are slow, the way they walk are slow, traffic lights are slow, getting the electricity back after a blackout is slow)

There you go. My 5 things - Like and Don't like about Sandakan.

To my fellow Sandakan friends, please do no take any of these personally. Just merely an opinion, which I'm free to have. Right? Who bloody cares anyway.

As days goes by, I'm beginning to settle down and fit in into this little city. Never imagined I have survived my first 3 months in Sandakan. I thought I'd be gone before April. Haha.

To remember this very day, I'll try to write something special.

Days in Sandakan

RM50 on fuel,
2 stops,
a long bumpy 6 hours drive
A sunburnt right arm and an awful backache,
A car packed with stuffs,
Sandakan, here I am!

Long straight pitch dark roads,
Far U-Turns and excessive roundabouts,
Spent RM70, to learn your roads,
Sandakan, why do u have to be so far?

Early dawn, early dusk,
by 9 you're almost dead,
sandakan sandakan...
my heart sighs for Sandakan,
for the day it leaps with joy.


signin' off...
till fingers meet keyboard,
audrey
xoxo.

My 10 Things About AstroBoy

*clears throat*

We meet new people every now and then. For myself, I believe, every new person I meet has its reasons and purposes - perhaps to like; to fall in love with; to learn something; to teach something; to get heartbroken and the list goes on. I don't know if any of you get my point here. Because, to some, meeting a new person is like a "touch n go" purposes.

So! (smiles) You've FINALLY met a new person. It may have started out with the boring regular exchanges of hellos, then would probably be hanging out several time, business meetings, then could lead to clubbing or breakfasting,lunching, dinnering and yada yada yada.... (you DO get my point right?).

Well, this new person that you've met will then MIGHT lead to something else. (in a bigger deeper way. LoL) To be a person that you may hate, like, love, married to, fling with, or simply, be just the best friend you'd ever had.

So, my dear readers, this is an introduction of a new character in my current phase of life, this "new character" may continue to exist in my upcoming posts. I Repeat, THAT MAY (and may only) exist in my upcoming posts.

AstroBoy is a new person I've came to know and this is my 10 things about AstroBoy.

10 things about AstroBoy

1. Humble. (Sometimes, too down to earth)
2. Has "foot in mouth" disease. (Luckily, it's not chronic or contagious).
3. Tall (For an Asian)
4. Funny (to me at least)
5. A Thinker (Thinks too much for own good)
6. Career + Family minded = personal sacrifices. (I admire)
7. Needs more calories (Ur still SEXY to me... though, I don't mind giving some of mine...)
8. Fun (same wavelength, gets my sarcasm and stupid jokes).
9. Intelligent. (sharp thinker, has a mind of his own)
10. Determine (I find it inspiring and sexy!)

Enlightened?


So, what's your say about meeting a new person?
Hmm... ?

till fingers meet keyboard,
keeping you posted from afar..
audrey
xoxo

Warning:
This introduction may and may not lead to any existence to my upcoming posts.

WELCOME

Welcome and Greetings,

*I should have done this a looonnng time ago.*

Somehow or rather, I've managed to procastinate this blog of mine for quite some time now. Tons of reasons I can make up as an excuse.

Well, my first post. Interestingly, I don't have any great ideas of what to write, neither do I have anything on my mind at the moment. I just know I have to start somewhere.

I'm not gonna make any promises that I'll post everyday, or be funny, or write smart stuffs like others do. But, I'll try to make it as interesting as i can. Perhaps, write about normal everyday stuff, seeing the world through my lil' sepet eyes.

Most importantly, I hope I'm able to keep up with this blog and not dump it like the one I did before. (Keeping my fingers crossed)

So, to whoever that's gonna read my humble writings on this free blog space of mine, I hope you won't yawn or complain. LOL. I welcome all criticism, all sarcasm, all comments, and all praises. Honestly, I hope you'll enjoy reading and seeing another part of the world, through my eyes, my blog. :) Peace.

*Don't click 'X' yet.*

till fingers meet keyboard,
audrey.
XOXO

*u may click 'X' button now. Thank u*